go on. just go through this day no matter how bad it will be, the voice inside my head said as i strutted my way to school.

i went through today, friday, 22nd july 2005. today was boring. today was sucky. but that voice in my head gave me all the strength i needed to go through today. what's with today? i don't know.

yesterday i learnt the power of trust. yesterday i was in a position of a person who had lost a trust of a friend. yesterday i realised the unfairness of the world. yesterday i thought of the things i did and didn't. yesterday i thought of the things people did to and for me. yesterday i thought of retributions. yesterday i wondered how something good and bad can happen at the same time and how my concoction of emotions will feel when that happens. yesterday i knew that life has its usual ups and downs.

today i still know that life has its usual ups and downs. today i realise that happiness comes when feelings of hatred recedes. today i still believe that keeping feelings concealed is a stupid way towards problem-solving. today i absolutely believe that revenge is a daft way to show how angry a person is. today i learn how to fight my desires and feel the contentment after doing so. today i value the awkwardness and dreads of going through silence. but today, i learn that a day doesn't necessarily end bad.

in other words, life is not bad after all. i hope.